Say it loud!

"Oh Those Critics; I do not say fuck the drama critics because fucking is too good for them" --Tennessee Williams in a letter to actress Maureen Stapleton.

The show I "wrote" and directed was torn apart this morning in the paper by a critic. At first I was so hurt, embarassed, defeated...And then I got to thinking...
I hate getting all "artsy". You usually won't find me talking about it cause it all seems so superficial and an excuse to try to make oneself look somehow more intelligent or cultured. But, I cannot deny, that it is actually what I am. I am an artist. I don't think I've ever called myself that. I always just thought I was a human being with some clever comebacks, a belty voice, a strong stage presence and OK timing. But now I realize that what I do is art. Some of it is good, some of it is shit; but it's art all the same.

The theatre critic can tear apart my show. I interpret his 1/2 page assault on my thoughts as his show of disappointment that what he thought he was going to see was not what he saw. By this I mean he expected yet another straight forward, respectable , TRADITIONAL interpretation of a classic genre. Have any of you met me?

I'm the girl who sat at recess in 2nd grade with Andy Moyer writing adaptations of movies we liked and turned them into plays instead of playing on the monkey bars. I'm the girl who in the fifth grade made the custom t-shirt shop make her a light blue t-shirt with the words "dare to be different" on it and would wear it to cheerleading practice just to piss the other girls off. I'm the one who in my 7th grade dance recital made up the huge "California Raisins" dream ballet sequence for the tap routine to "I heard it Through the Grapevine", at which my dance teacher laughed and quickly dismissed. (I even thought that my dad could make a huge "Raisin Bran" flat out of some extra plywood at the shop! I offered it for free, Donna Gould! FREE!). I'm the one who in high school acting class created the lounge singer "Lottie Sunshine" that took the school by storm! I'm the one who, at my wedding, tore the veil out of my hair when "Burning Love" came on because the thing was so damn obnoxious and I needed to dance. I'm the girl who sings "Homecoming Queen's Gotta Gun" at karaoke every single time cause it makes ME laugh. I'm the one who changes her haircolor once a year just cause it's fun...I DO NOT do things- ANYTHING- in the traditional sense.

My point is this....Art is about expression. Art is about making people start a conversation. Art is about originality and doing things YOUR way. My show, although a tribute to a great playwright, was done MY way. If it wasn't, who would want to see it? We do theatre or paint pictures or write songs because we need to be heard and we need to express ourselves. I used someone else's words to express myself, which is what most actors do....and because I was "in charge" of it and had an unbelievably loyal and dedicated 6 actor army working with me, we put our own little personality on it. And it was poo-poo'ed.

People who critique theatre need to check themselves. Whether it's a small town or a Broadway show or a blockbuster Hollywood movie, each and every person working on the project is there because of the passion for their art. When the critique itself becomes more important that the art, there's something wrong. If the art is not pleasing to a critic, so be it. That's fine. But these people need to understand that if they do not give artists the chance to be creative, the artists will stop taking the leap and stop taking the chances because pretty soon there will be no audience for it.

Critics- you don't have to like anything you see. That's fine. You usually don't. I've been involved in some 4 star shows. I've also been involved in some 1 star shows....either way, the same reasoning went into each of their creations- someone, somewhere had something to say and needed a way to get it heard. Remember this. We do not offer ourselves up to your judgement because we need your approval. We offer ourselves up because we need to be heard.
Stop trying to stifle our creativity. If every artist since da Vinci listened to people like you every single painting would be a paint by number of the Mona Lisa and that would be a shame indeed.

I'm an artist- and I'm proud (thank you, james Brown). I don't play by the rules; I don't care if you like it or you think it fucking sucks. I have something to say, this is how I say it and I will take the leap because I'm alive, and I can!
Like I have told the actors in this show time and time again: I would rather have leapt off a cliff in the hopes I could fly and end up falling to my death than never to have leapt at all...